I have spent most of my adult life drunk, serving or bar-tending, blowing my money in bars and focused on superficial crap. I’ve never finished anything I have started, and I just kinda floated around this life waiting for something to happen to me instead of making anything happen. I have basically always been afraid to be me and do what I want to do.
That was before I “woke up”. I was not awakened through a dream, vision, messages or any phenomena I experience regularly now. I was awakened by a flesh and blood man who meant to find me and do just that.
One day, a new guy showed up at work. He greeted me warmly, and I felt comfortable talking to him immediately. We connected on several levels through shared beliefs, and the desire to do something about the state of the world. He offered me a way to make a difference, so I started researching for him. My directed researching quickly graduated from corrupt humans and their tools, to the Anunnaki.
My research got weirder, as did our conversations. I was spending most of my time outside work with him, discussing amazing concepts I was afraid to bring up to anyone else. He knew so much about subjects I was always interested in that I found myself being there with him as much as possible. Once I started questioning where this knowledge came from, our direction changed again.
He told me that we were part of the Anunnaki, way back in Sumerian times, and I was his best friend. He said he stood up to Enki during a council meeting, demanding humans be treated as equals with their “Gods”, and for this was cast out to the earth to suffer for all eternity. I was cast down with him to suffer because I was always at his side. Apparently we had wings back then, which were taken, essentially making us “fallen angels”. Another name he told me he goes by is “Lucifer”.
So here I am, going to work every day with Lucifer, then hanging out with him after work for hours. This was all hitting me pretty hard and I had a lot of doubts. I told him I thought Lucifer was a bad guy. He says he is misunderstood. The Illuminati believe that as well, and I don’t like them, so I became uncomfortable around him, but I kept hanging around because I was changing for the better, regardless of his intentions.
Through YouTube music videos, and guided meditation, something was happening to me I couldn’t describe. He told me all about the End Times, Ascension, etc., and he always was telling me to “Wake the f*** up Jason!” rushing me along. Speaking in strange languages to something in the sky and bragging to that being in the sky about finding me first. We were also planning to be roommates and get a house, which would mean leaving my sick parents.
I was finding lots of information online about love, light, and happiness. He was telling me how he would be the one to rip the Earth apart and take lives (Armageddon), and I am the one that will rebuild it as it should be. I have always been compassionate, and he is very angry. It wasn’t working.
My home life had become extremely strained because of this relationship. Everyone else has an adverse reaction to being around this guy. The hate and pure rage he is capable of is frightening. My mother told me she sees the devil when she looks at him, and can’t stand being around him. I was ready to move in with him. He left his wife and child to spend more time working on my awakening. A decision had to be made.
I decided that I was going to stay with my parents to help them. I was also very uncomfortable around him now. He would try to start fights with others to involve me in. He tried to get me to drink several times, saying he wouldn’t let me get out of control, which is always what happens if I drink (I didn’t). He didn’t want me to research Anunnaki history. His story didn’t fit with the printed stories I found, which only added to my discomfort. Even though this man had infinite answers for me in any area I had questions, and he promised he would never do anything to harm me, I decided I got what I needed and it was time to move on. I gradually ended contact with him, and found STC.
I had used Ghost Radar with him because of a Jinn presence that was pestering us (Marduk) and it freaked me out and I deleted Ghost Radar. One night at home I felt compelled to use GR again, and the words that came up led me to Thinktoask.com, where Leslee posts a lot about GR. So now I am constantly bombarded with positive messages of love and light through STC and the network of related blogs, rather than the negativity and blind anger I was dealing with to try to find my way.
Leslee found time to talk to me and help me figure out I was in the right place now. I am eternally grateful for her warm welcome which eased a lot of fear I had about my whole life situation at the time. I have also connected with Michael who has helped tremendously in showing me different views on my situation. My spiritual growth has been accelerating rapidly since finding my new online home.
Yesterday, while on the phone with Michael I realized the idea of “Lucifer” applies to not just a man, but to the Anunnaki rulers that are responsible for the oppressive system humanity has struggled under for so long (Illuminati control). Since I was a part of them so long ago, “Lucifer” applies to me as well, THEN, not NOW. All this painful stuff I’m having to go through and clear may very well be karma from back then. I am full of love and light for all that is now.
I have felt drawn to study the darker things throughout my life, but not practice them. I never understood why I felt drawn to dark, Luciferian books, music, etc. in the past. 13 years ago in a rush to turn in an art exam, I drew Michaelangelo’s David. I couldn’t get the feet right, so I drew him with cloven hooves instead. I turned the drawing in that way. David Wilcock’s last article exposes this work of art as being a reference to Lucifer, and there was another sculpture in the article depicted once with hooves. That blew me away that I put hooves on David so long ago without understanding why, but I understand now.
The draw I felt was trying to get me to process these old feelings of guilt and pain from my past when I did terrible things. I also have a lot of fear left in me, especially regarding why someone would be searching for me for thousands of years to wake me up, and what might happen if I don’t play along with their agenda. This has all happened this year, and the person is still around. I suppose I may run into him around town some day, but I no longer fear him, the Anunnaki, Illuminati, any of the people that have been watching me since I woke up. I am free, and far stronger than I used to be.
I have truly come full circle in this journey, and am excited for our future. With this post, I release all my fears. I am truly happy no matter what is happening around me or to me, and I know in my heart that I am where I should be now. I’m no longer lost or alone. I’m so happy to be in contact with all of our brothers and sisters we can’t see yet! I am thankful to have their help as well.
I love you all!