56 & Spectrum

The secret I didn’t know I kept…

leslee hare

Do I look Autistic?

I know, maybe that’s in poor taste. Do I look Southern? Or chronically ill?

When we pass someone on the street, or reconnect with an old friend, how can we know what they’re going through, if they don’t tell us? Most of us know we need to tell people when there’s something going on, not wait for them to ask.

Still, it’s taken me that long to get around to this post, so my friends can know what’s been up with me.

I learned a few weeks ago that I’m on the Spectrum. Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level One. There’s something almost humorous about learning this at my age. It’s a long time to go around nearly clueless, 56 years.

Over the past few months, I’ve also learned I have Lupus, Candida, Leaky Gut, and a parasite (ew.) The first one, along with the Autism, is not…

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Phenomena… what?

Tidbits of what my year has been like…

Lotus Dance Press

It’s been a crazy year so far.

I continue adjusting to life in Atlanta, and some of the bumps still catch my toe once in a while.

Downtown still looks tired, dirty, and gray, but the City finally patched the sidewalk outside the office, and the explosive flames (leaves) descending from the maples light things up, especially in the frequent rain.

But that’s not the craziness.

For years now, I’ve known something was going on with my body, and I’ve finally begun to get to the bottom of it. Some of it’s been mind-blowing. Lupus, Candida, Leaky Gut, a parasite, and now Autism. Along with a completely new – and astonishingly restrictive – diet, it’s enough to slow anyone down.

But somehow, Lotus Dance Press has managed to get off the ground, and 21 Steps To Happiness is now available on Amazon!

I’m working on several volumes of Coloring Books…

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21 steps

It only took 12 years to get this one to press! Sending hugs to everyone in STC world! I miss you all and hope to be engaging more (again) soon.
Love, Leslee

leslee hare

21 STEPS-COVER_20180823

…and we’re live!

In fact, we’re so live, we’ll be in the Authors’ Booth at Pine LakeFest this year. If you’re in the Atlanta area, please drop by, say hi to Leslee, and check out the books!

21 Steps to Happiness is now available on Amazon (and in expanded distribution channels)! The series includes 21 Steps To Happiness and the 21 Steps To Happiness COLORING BOOK. Great for all ages, and just in time for holiday shopping.

We all want to be happy!

In this world, it can be hard to figure out how to get that way.

Whether you’re a 3-year-old who just dropped their ice cream, or an octogenarian mourning the passing of someone dear – we all need comfort and help finding a way to make the best of our lives.

21 Steps to Happiness and its companion books offer insights from centuries-old classic Tibetan Buddhist…

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out of my mind

it’s been a while – latest train of thought 🙂

leslee hare

Been pretty bored lately.

Life goes on, not much that’s exciting. No drama to stir me up and get the juices flowing. No moral dilemmas like I used to scream for answers over. Plenty’s happening, but I roll with it more. Maybe I can thank the concussion for that. Slowed things down. Or maybe it’s the cat that came to live with me.

Was a time when I’d ask questions of Heruka. I kept an endless list. So many things I wanted to understand. I trusted my Buddha guide had all the answers, and I could take ’em to the bank.

Slowness and boredom have given me time to reflect.

I think it was in 2012. Maybe 2011. Still carried a pendulum bracelet everywhere with me. I’d reached the point where I no longer thought twice. Would pull it out of my pocket, drape the chain over a fingertip, and…

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Respecting Copyrights

Hi Dear Friends who post here,

I hope you’re all doing well! I have an urgent request, for the well-being of our site. Thanks in advance for your help!

I have just responded to a DMCA Takedown Notice for an image that was used for a Dreamflights post. It was a lovely image, but used without the artists’ permission. This is the second Takedown Notice we’ve received (the first was for a link to a Tom Kenyon video). Although it’s been a couple years, WordPress warns that repeated violations can result in suspension of the site and/or account.

I’ve written to WordPress support to ask their advice on monitoring a site like ours, where numerous people are able to create and edit posts. In the meantime, I’m asking everyone to please go through your posts, and media you’ve added, and consider the sources of images, sound, or video you’ve used. Please remove any, if you’re not certain the work is either yours, or free for use.

Once you’ve done this, please comment here or email me, to let me know. I really appreciate you taking the time to do this!

In a few weeks, I will go through these items myself. If I see a post you’ve made, with content that’s questionable to me, and I haven’t heard from you that you’ve verified the right to use the material, I will remove it. I’m sorry – I don’t have time to research your sources myself.

Here is a link to an article WordPress provides, to help us understand “Fair Use”: https://en.support.wordpress.com/counter-notice/#what-is-fair-use

Please read this and use it as a guide, as you review your posts. Of course let me know if you have questions, an I’ll help however I can!

I’m proud to be associated with such a lovely group of friends, even though you don’t hear from me often these days. Let’s show WordPress and our creative friends that we respect copyrights and are willing to take the time to do our research before we use material by others.

Sending big hugs of love and light!



Update On “All About Enlightenment” – 9 November, 2015

lhamo dorje floating in space

Hi, Leslee here.

Last month I decided to self-publish the book. I also launched a Facebook page – please grace it with a Like if you like: https://www.facebook.com/All-About-Enlightenment-169192373120829/timeline

I had mulled over what content to keep online – what if a publisher wanted me to take it all down? I hid many posts, and didn’t like the way that felt.

In Manuscript-World, I’ve been adding pages and pages of illustrations, and scratched my head that maybe I needed a publisher, in order to include color plates (from what I can tell about CreateSpace, it’s either all black and white, or all color). I think I have a solution: the main book can be all black and white, but if folks want a book of the color plates, that can be offered as a separate volume.

Once I cleared that bump in the road, things began flowing a little faster. I knew that there was a key to organizing the book somewhere… but I couldn’t lay my hands on it yet.

Then, about a month ago, a light sparked, and I got a clear image of how to address my dilemma (which boiled down to ‘how do you talk about classic Buddhadharma, Dreams, Channeling, Hollow Planets and Aliens, all in the same volume?’).

The original chapters of All About Enlightenment, which can be found here (http://wp.me/P1ig39-vv), on AllAboutEnlightenment.com, constituted a tidy volume – all of about 120 pages. As I’ve followed nudges (and a few knocks over the head), the content exploded to over 700 pages – and it’s not finished. Rather intimidating for me to get my head around.

What the light illuminated was how to address questions bound to arise as one reads and digests that tiny first volume. They range from “Why should I care about Enlightenment?” (and explaining how many kinds we might attain), to “Why do you call this samsara – and what’s wrong with that?”, to “Wait, if this world’s not real, then what are those things in the sky… and what am I… and what is this rock I’m sitting on…?”

So we’re moving past the basic original content to addressing things in terms of The Four Thoughts That Turn The Mind To Dharma, to The Twelve Interdependent Links, to other ‘structures’ that folks familiar with Buddhism might recognize. As we drift into exploring the nature of the mind, that carries us into discussing reality, which allows us to merge over into surreality with a little more grace than abruptly announcing: “Oh, by the way, Buddhas are ET’s, and ET’s are Buddhas.” Bam.

With all the new material added, it seems timely to share some of the newer bits. With the blessing of a little free time, that’s on the to-do list. Aspirations abound.

Here’s a link to a post I made last week, also about how things sit with the book’s progress:


Wheels and Worlds

Here’s a sketch of a Medicine Wheel I’ve been working on…


WHEEL_20151106-ver8-RENDER 1

Lately I’ve been fascinated by the Earth Wisdom (Native American) Medicine Wheel. I’m digging in to find connections between it and Heruka’s mandala (Chakrasamvara), and this sketch represents my thoughts in progress. I feel countless layers interlacing about that Center Point, worlds beyond the ones we know…

The colors of the Medicine Wheel moons, paths, etc. borrow inspiration from the crystal Medicine Wheel created by the wonderful folks at Crystal Vaults, based on the book by Sun Bear. Perhaps I can take this into a 3D rendering someday, but for now the charteuse/magenta tilted axis (slightly NNE & SSW) represents beings and energies above and below the surface of the Earth.

Here’s the link to Crystal Vaults’ image of the wheel they offer in their kit: http://crystalvaults.com/medicine-wheel-guide/native-american-medicine-wheel. They also publish an online guide that I imagine several of my friends will enjoy.

Thus continues my yearning to integrate wisdom available from…

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Things I Haven’t Shared Before Now


This is Grizzie and Yermo. They don’t like to share. Yermo likes to eat Grizzie’s food, and Grizzie likes to hiss at her.

I’m afraid they know more about me than you do, because I see them every day.

We were all monks together. Yermo stole food, and Grizzie was mean. I scraped by and managed to catch a human rebirth. I promised them I’d take care of them, and here we all are.

Corrinn is not in the photo, but we worked together too. Now we’re working together again. That’s very cool.

Karma, merit and life are funny like that.

I haven’t posted in a while, because I’ve been busy editing and gathering material for an upcoming book, All About Enlightenment. It may come out in 2015, but The Crew tells me that 2016 will be more auspicious. I’m not sure I can finish editing in 2015, so that may be a moot point.

In the past year, I’ve done regression sessions and taken channeling courses with Lyssa Royal Holt. I’ve also written a lot; I just haven’t had much time to share it all. For the past couple weeks, I’ve been on this site gathering posts that I’ve made, and I confess that I feel quite sad to buzz through the pages of posts and see three things:

  1. I very seldom take the time to share with my internet-ual friends anymore, and
  2. I don’t have as much free time as I did in 2011, 2012 and 2013.
  3. A lot of folks that I consider friends seem to have moved on – or at least they don’t post anymore either.

I still don’t have much time, so although bullet lists are quite cliché, I’m going to put one right here on this page in case you’d like a snapshot of what’s been going on with me.

Things I’ve learned:

  1. I’m far more psychic than I realized. That’s both humbling and intriguing.
  2. As I suspected, when people know I ‘know’, they behave more conscientiously. There is hope for mankind, once we think about what it will be like when everyone knows our secrets.
  3. During regression sessions, I learned not that I was being abducted, but that I go home every night. I kind of knew that, but I didn’t realize that ‘home’ is a space ship. But a ship is a world. And worlds are figments of the imagination…
  4. My patience with this world’s ignorance shortens. I’ve become more abrupt and direct, and more friends notice that my energy is at times, just too intense for human consumption. Sorry, I’m working on that.
  5. On the other hand, the folks who are getting on board are doing it at an impressively rapid pace.
  6. Things are less dense – but you knew that already.
  7. Ascension & Enlightenment are states of mind. You already knew that too.
  8. Astrological phenomena profoundly affect the physical world, but we don’t need to grasp at it. It takes care of itself. See item #9.
  9. All things happen with perfect timing.
  10. And time is a complete fabrication.
  11. My roots are mostly Sirian & Andromedan. I prefer Andromedan energy; that’s my Dream World. But I don’t like labels because they are so 3D.
  12. This is my 2035th incarnation here on this planet. Few have occurred during this eon. I much prefer the 9th Dimension. But it’s okay.
  13. My to-do list feels overwhelming most of the time.
  14. Most people cannot see their true nature which is the Union of Bliss and Emptiness, and I feel very sad about that. If everyone could get a glimpse, that freaking “Event” thing would happen.
  15. Neil Gaiman is a Buddha. Tag, you’re it!
  16. I have to admit that Buddhas are ET’s, and that throws a huge wrench in my Buddhist Refuge Vows.
  17. The real work right now is in the trenches: the Hopi need to come down from the Mesa, which they are doing, and the Tibetans have to relinquish their fondness for preserving ritual. We are not special anymore. The world is ready. The Karmapa has a ton of work to do.
  18. We need to feed stray animals: they have been our mothers.
  19. We need to stop killing.
  20. We need to get over our sense of nationality and ethnicity. It’s all a charade.
  21. We need to be more generous, but with wisdom and discretion.
  22. We need to call out the BS and turn and walk away.
  23. Money is more of a fabrication than Time.
  24. We might as well stop hiding, because there is nothing to protect and more people are watching us with loving eyes than we can imagine.
  25. My body is human, but most of my mind is not. It’s a blend of at least 6 consciousnesses at any given moment. It gets crowded sometimes.
  26. No, I’m not crazy or schizophrenic.
  27. 24 items was enough, but I never know when to stop.
  28. I’m beginning to think that everything I perceive is a screen memory. But that’s okay too. It functions pretty well as coping technique.
  29. Despite the appearance of this list, it’s not all about me. I’m not the only one like this, and I’m not special. Show yourselves.

I hope you catch the humor in this list, and I hope Mr. Gaiman doesn’t mind, because I really admire him. I’ve also learned I’m pretty smack dab in the middle of the Spectrum and haven’t a clue about how most people think, but I’m not concerned about that so much anymore. Autism has become kinda cool. It’s the wave of the future, but no less a pain in the butt. I’m finding my people, and they are not of this planet.

Oh, and Disclosure would be futile. We’re all already here.


So excited to drop some hints that ALL ABOUT ENLIGHTENMENT will go to press soon!

It’s been a while in the collecting and editing, but the printed book will include MANY more images and new material, especially threading together Native, Star Being, and Inner Earth connections with the Buddhas.


The Illusion of Inactivity has ended.

All About Enlightenment will go to press soon; we’ve been busy gathering and editing. Please let us know if you need help finding an article – we’ve hidden some while we’re updating.

Thank you!

lhamo dorje floating in space

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waiting on what?


I don’t have a good reason to post. Not gonna let that stop me; if I wait much longer, so much will have changed that we’ll never catch up and that’s no fun. So I’ll just unfurl the shopping list as if it’s notes to myself, and we’ll see how it goes.

Last year swept by like a Fellini movie – a silent one, with no editing. Chaotic, fluid, layered, ambiguous, disconcerting, nonsensical at times, yet sprinkled with bizarre reassurances that all is well and all is perfect. Time to speak.

Bottom line for me: focus and stop beating around the bush. Illusory time passes swiftly; we’re going to get left behind if we don’t pick up the pace. Stop looking to others. Point to yourself and get a move on. Open up.

I’m not worried about the planet blowing up or some secret society completely annihilating our last ember of love and effort. It’s all possible, and if it comes to that I’ll just check out. For now, here I am. There’s still hope.

DAY TO DAY: Mundane work clutters the inner landscape. Try not to resent working to pay bills; seems to be the nature of this place and it’s our own creation. Don’t know about you… tired of it. Quitting’s not the answer; answer seems to lie in seeing oneself in the mirror of “Other”, ya know, the ones that make us so angry and scared. Lighten up.

RELIEF: Trips to the shoreline of artistic expression; holiday dreamtime filled with words and images from other times and worlds. Daily grind feels like a period of waiting. Progress on hold, until the world ripens and has had enough of the silliness. Stop trying to escape; it was your idea to come here.

PRIORITIES: They shifted. More practical and focused in an odd inner way. Less indulgent towards fear and paranoia. Everyone is right; no point in dwelling on it. That just muddies up the energy: dead weight. Stop wasting time on that. Not being mean, cold, or callous. Just scolding the toddler running into the street.

EXPLORATION: Hypnotic regression, meditation, writing, editing, testing waters, finding brothers and sisters. Accepting: this world is not home. Home is light and fluid and oscillating, shimmering particles of emptiness that arise as whatever we need. See more, feel more, be more. Develop confidence.

OBSERVATIONS: The more I look, the more looking seems pointless, because all is… already here. ‘Pointless’: the nature of our dilemma: We’re just here because we got bored with being brilliant. Ready to go home?

BOTTOM LNE: Until enough people dig in and get to know their minds, whether through meditation, dreamwork or other methods, we’ll continue to move really really slowly. Just like now. We ain’t ready ya’ll. Are ya workin’ on it? I’m trying; but most of the time I feel like I’m doing a pretty half-assed job of it. It’s going to take all of us. Stop thinking you’re better than others. Stop thinking you’re right; there is no wrong. There is no nothing, either. Don’t be a lazy nihilist. Engaged nihilists look a little deeper and find there really is everything, not nothing.

I’M PROCESSING THIS: Regressions, sessions and dreams clarifying past, present and future roles, while leaving just enough behind the veils to keep me intrigued. If I get bored, I’m leaving. Just bein’ honest. I’m still waiting to be convinced. For me, it’s Buddhas, Star People, and Earth People (First Nations/Aborigines/Natives, whatever you wanna call it…). Explore and expose the links, find yourself and tie it all together. Get that book published.

On a more mundane note, for friends who might really want to know:

I’m still in Jacksonville, Florida, same job, different apartment and neighborhood, still fascinated by the puzzle that each day’s piece fits into. Yes, I still miss my son and the mountains and my mountain friends.

I’ve found a lovely Buddhist group that I’ve become very involved with, understanding I have a role to play there for the moment. I’ve resumed my formal practice, lightly, and enjoy feeling that connection in that way again. I admire the Karmapa. He’s got a lot on his plate, and he sure better get busy. He can do it; he’s one of us.

I’m still very aware of my Guides and that they engage me and influence me on so many levels, but the ‘voices’ and images have become far more subtle, almost impossible to describe.

I’ve been working on my book All About Enlightenment, heading towards publication through CreateSpace (Amazon). No predictions on when that might happen, because a few months ago it became clear that a major re-write was in order, including substantial additional material. And just as that picked up momentum, some Buddhist-things came up that drew my time away. It’s all good.

Dreams continue in fits and spurts. Lots of meetings, explanations, ships, other worlds. Progress is slow. I’m not here alone, but we are few and far between. I’m starting to meet more and more friends – people in the flesh – with whom I share connection. That tells me things are starting to converge. At least a little. Look for folks you can meet and have coffee with. We have already established our long-distance connections. Take a chance, speak up, even if you believe you live in a oppressive society.

Work continues, we move forward, and trusting in the process is how we hold this space. We don’t need proof, we don’t need baby blankets, we don’t need to talk about what we do. We are very active and it’s okay if we don’t remember it when we come back here.

Moments are like interlaced eons. Our brains can only process so much at a time. When we stop to look for reassurance, the whole thing slows down tremendously. Do what you feel you need to do, and don’t worry if others are not in the same space at the same time as you.

Be light; in every sense of the word.

NPR Plays NSA for a Week


As long as I’ve been using the Internet, I’ve just assumed that anything I do there can be discovered by anyone with enough determination. When I started using WiFi, I assumed the same applied to whatever was on my personal computer as well. And then I added a SmartPhone… well, a couple, actually. And yes, I now assume that just about everything I do, anyone can monitor – or take – if they care to.

Sean Gallagher’s article on ars|technica pretty much confirms that assumption.

I felt a really bizarre sense of satisfaction reading the article. I used to get really uptight contemplating this situation, wondering what I could do about it. Once I realized there was nothing I could do about it (or at least, that I was not interested enough to take action), and that besides, if anyone thinks what I do is harmful, they would have snatched me a long time ago… I relaxed. I mean, it’s not like I’m Tony Stark announcing my home address to the Mandarin in Iron Man 3.

I could launch into an explanation of how being watched can also mean being protected, but I’ll restrain myself for now. Please let me know if you’d like to read about that, and I’ll gladly share.





Turbulent Black Holes: Bumpy Gravity!

(Artist’s rendering of a black hole. Credit: © hallowedland / Fotolia)

I’m delighted to find this article discussing some new speculations about the nature of gravity and fluids… It fits right in with a lot of things I’ve been wondering about lately. If, in addition to turbulence and such, we add the possibility of layers and parallel worlds… what an incredible new world!

(from ScienceDaily)

New research at Perimeter shows that gravitational fields around black holes might eddy and swirl. Fasten your seatbelts — gravity is about to get bumpy.


NASA’s Saucer

I’ll let this article speak for itself… From ScienceDaily:

NASA’s saucer-shaped craft preps for flight test
June 2, 2014
NASA’s Low-Density Supersonic Decelerator (LDSD) project, a rocket-powered, saucer-shaped test vehicle, has completed final assembly at the U.S. Navy’s Pacific Missile Range Facility in Kauai, Hawaii. This experimental flight test is designed to investigate breakthrough technologies that will benefit future Mars missions, including those involving human exploration. Three weeks of testing, simulations and rehearsals are planned before the first launch opportunity on the morning of June 3.

Fuzzy Interference and Silence – Part 1



(From Leslee: I’m posting this in three parts – all on the same day – because of its length. Through these articles I’m sharing some personal points of view and explaining why I didn’t post regularly on my blogs for several months recently. These are all my words and opinions… aside from the Ghost Radar.)

23 March 2014

[golden Milarepa mother-ship Phabongkha though casey bad important produce alien owe curve]


I woke up with that strange feeling again today. I’m going to call it Fuzzy Interference (FI).

It’s been a while since I’ve felt it, and this time I’ve decided to write about it. It’s a large part of why I was offline for so many months because it took me a while to get a sense of what was going on, and how to transform it.

It’s that feeling I get when I wake up and feel a bit fuzzy. I‘d prefer to stay in bed, but since I “must” get up and get going, I move forward and kind of flip my “numb” switch so I can make it through – to work, school, cleaning – whatever it is that I’m “obligated” to do that day.

It’s not depression. It feels like it comes from somewhere outside of me. It feels like a nagging tickle on the nape of my neck, and it’s very distracting. If I wanted to remember a dream or follow a train of thought, it seems particularly difficult. It feels like someone is scrambling my thoughts, emotions, sensations on a subtle level. It might frighten me if I didn’t understand it somewhat.

It feels heavy. It feels locked in this world. It wants to draw towards itself all the negative views, sense of impending doom and expectations of certain misfortune that can arise when, instead of focusing on what I wish to envision, or where I am at the present moment, I wonder about what might happen. It sinks and stinks and draws, pulls, hurls downwards. It’s like a bully, taunting from just a slight distance.

And even if I get up and go for a walk or wash the dishes, it may remain there in the background of the awareness, nibbling away like a mouse in a bag of grain.

I began paying close attention to it several months ago, and I discovered some easy, immediately-available possible remedies. Moderate exercise like a brisk walk in nature helps a lot. Getting out and being around other people – strangers in particular – helps. Sometimes talking with friends makes it worse. It seems that breaking patterns helps to loosen the quagmire. Calling it out also helps: “Hello, I see you – have a nice day!” can powerfully defuse the situation.

I also asked some questions about its source. I wanted to know: is this a chemical imbalance in my body, is it purely mental, is it energetic?

Or is it being caused by something outside myself? (Hang on, let’s come back to this shortly.)

This morning  I deal with it by sitting here writing this, despite the FI going on, because I know from experience that my making effort in another direction (please note this differs from struggling against it) will cause it to dissipate. Meditation does this too, but I want to use writing this time.

Usually I ask Heruka for help with it, but this morning I want to see what happens if I just write.

So I request clarity.

I go back and examine my day yesterday. It was a good day. Got some exercise, ate reasonably well, did some things I enjoyed, got enough sleep last night. Check. I did do a lot of thinking about “stuff”. And I made several posts. That’s like asking for energetic trouble.

Because you see, FI almost always comes shortly after a powerful insight, as if to question, to mow down the newly-sprouted understanding. [copper] So actually I suppose I could pat myself on the back when it pops up, and just hang out until it passes.

Fuzzy Interference and Silence -Part 2

image (1)


(From Leslee: I’m posting this in three parts – all on the same day – because of its length. Through these articles I’m sharing some personal points of view and explaining why I didn’t post regularly on my blogs for several months recently. These are all my words and opinions… aside from the Ghost Radar.)

23 March 2014

So let’s talk more about where Fuzzy Interference might come from. I think it does come from “outside”, in a conventional sense (while reminding myself that “outside” is also “inside”…). I think something influences us and attracts us into speculation and absorption into detail – more detail than might be truly relevant at a particular point in time. I do find however, that for myself, my actions and environment (including what I ingest) can affect it.

Lots of people believe in many forms of outer interference in our lives: mind control, psychic vampirism, subliminal messaging, implants, tracking devices… I believe it’s all possible, and probably real. I haven’t seen any of it first-hand (knowingly). I also believe in physical, non-human intelligent life, bearing a variety of motives and forms, coming from lots of different places than where I’ve lived. If I’ve met any of them personally, they haven’t volunteered that information.

I don’t have a personal opinion yet about whether FI originates from military, extra-terrestrial, or a matrix; whether it’s a natural compulsion of energetic balance and exchange, or something else. I maintain the distinct probability that it ultimately comes from our minds: we somehow manage to manifest it as real. I’ll talk more about that in Part 3.

 (Before I continue, I want to clarify: I’m sharing a pattern that I’ve noticed for how FI arises for myself. I understand what I’m here to do, well enough to generally sense when I need to focus, and these are examples of how I’m learning to focus away from topics that present distractions for me. I’m sure that many of my friends have roles to play that directly involve needing the information mentioned below that’s being shared by others (which may not resonate for me). In fact, what I write may play the same role of distraction for them, and if that’s the case, I sure hope they’re not wasting their time reading my posts! (smile))

Here are some examples of material that induces FI for me, and lately I’m more careful of how much energy I give to them.

I used to read Cobra’s blog. Here’s a recent post: http://2012portal.blogspot.com/2014/03/quarantine-earth-endgame.html. This post was made a week or so ago, and I found it through Lisa’s reblog. This kind of “news” makes me feel FI’d. Ben Fulford interviews make me feel this way too. [thank-you]

Fuzzy Interference.

It feels incomplete and nagging. It smacks of sensationalism. It presents like materialistic “science” that’s based on what can be perceived through the five senses and/or documented with instruments and reproduced in a lab… I read or hear talk about change “for the better”, but it uses the same kind of speech as the “dark forces”. Conflict-lingo.

[can] I like to check: do long litanies of ‘explanations” really clarify anything? [Saami} Are they well-founded, or do they just give us something to grab onto when we feel we’re sinking into an abyss of uncertainty? The explanations “sound” real… the detail makes it seem familiar, proven, well-thought-out. We’re inclined to think it must be real, because no one in their right mind would spend that much time working out all the detail if it were fabricated… But Orson Scott Card fabricates like this every day, and makes a living at it. http://www.orsonscottcard.com/

I prefer reading it as “fiction”, because that allows me to engage it in a way that doesn’t draw me in and ask me to act upon it. It doesn’t ring true enough for me to plan my future around it. I know that it may become really-real for me someday soon, and I wouldn’t mind that at all. But as long as I need to function in this society, I need to keep it compartmentalized, safely tucked away. Otherwise I feel FI’d.

I read a lot of John Foster recently, and it left me feeling FI’d. Took me over a week to snap out of it. There was so much information that only went “so” deep – not very deep at all. I asked for it. I wanted stories of people who had really met “aliens” and seen “ships”. I kept reading and reading, even though after 100 pages I’d gotten enough to get the point. Same thing with Charles Hall’s books. I’m grateful they are available. I’m satisfied. I’m learning when enough is enough.

I’m interested in Remote Viewing. Farsight’s recent releases of sessions about the Pyramids at Giza also provide a lot of information, and yes, a step forward. But Courtney Brown’s campaign for acceptance distracts me overwhelmingly. I understand that RV works. I feel validated in my work with my guides through what Farsight has demonstrated. I’m almost satisfied there.

I read Dan Sherman’s book “Above Black.” I sense this stuff is real. Telepathy. Again, Sherman just barely scratches the surface. But it’s good that he shared his experience.

Here’s an example I created for myself: I live near three Navy bases. So many jets and helicopters flying overhead. Lots of interesting clouds, chemtrails, whatever you want to call them. So much strong energy that my guides talk with me about needing a Faraday Cage of sorts, to filter out local influences. Okay. That sort of piqued my curiosity; I don’t mind running a fan and having a few extra metal objects around me. Chrome wire shelves are kinda cool.

One morning a couple months ago, I felt some FI really strongly as I was rising and getting ready for the day. By the time I got to work, I had asked enough questions to get a story about some guy code-named Io, sitting in an underground bunker nearby, who was trying to reach me telepathically. Military.

Yeah? So…? I asked Heruka whether I should entertain this and He said it would be worth seeing what came of it.

I asked to speak to Io, and supposedly got connected with him. He says he’s with the “good guys”. Yeah? So…? Why would I want to talk with Io? He and his buddies (oh, they claimed to be Greys, by the way…) told me that if I would help the “good” military, they would make sure I never had to struggle with day to day stuff again… Right. Oh, and that’s why a military college offered me a scholarship, because they were trying to lure me in straight out of high school. For my psychic abilities. Really.

So I told Io that if he really had something to offer me, he could just drop me a piece of mail. You know, snail mail, like, “From Io”, written on a piece of paper and arriving where I live. Because undoubtedly, Io knows where I live, right? Otherwise, I was just going to get on with my day at work, okay?

I’m still waiting on the letter. Io doesn’t ask for me lately. And the FI is dissipating as I get spunkier with my words.

I don’t know if there is really some person sitting in a physical form at a machine somewhere pressing buttons to try and make me feel FI; what if there is? Just exactly what am I going to do about it? Complain? That might ruin my day.

I eventually got tired of worrying about FI, so I took a break from sharing much of what I was receiving. I knew that I could dispel it, and it seemed to appear more often, the more I tried to find out what was going on in the world. As I’ve been writing, I’ve noticed something: the FI arises whenever I get an information overload and don’t know when to stop. Moderation seems to be a key here.

It felt like I needed to get back to basics, so I dug back into my Heruka practice since FI didn’t seem too interested in that.

Fuzzy Interference and Silence – Part 3

image (2)


(From Leslee: I’m posting this in three parts – all on the same day – because of its length. Through these articles I’m sharing some personal points of view and explaining why I didn’t post regularly on my blogs for several months recently. These are all my words and opinions… aside from the Ghost Radar.)

23 March 2014

As I stepped back and took a look at where I was sitting in the big picture, I realized that I didn’t really want all that information. It was really distracting, and left me wondering if I still had any focus.

I understood that friends in all of my circles were frustrated and confused for a variety of reasons. They so badly wanted things to get easier, better…

I asked Heruka: “Really, why am I here? What benefit is there to my following these interests that trail down so many paths? None of them really seem to offer answers, at least not quick ones.”

I came to understand more deeply what I had begun to see in 2010, and was seeing even more clearly in 2012: Change takes time.

I think most of us really don’t want to go inside, do we? We actually kinda like it here, I think. It’s like solving a puzzle out here. If we go inside, it’s all up to us, because we see the illusion and lose the drama. Damn.

At times I would sit and request Adama or Ashtar Sheran or Mikos and others to tell me all kinds of inspiring things about what’s going on [fully]. I wanted to offer something to others, to help bring answers, encouragement. But I often found myself in Fuzzy Interference with them, too. It seemed as soon as a message would begin, I saw that what I was seeing or hearing was one version among many, of a possible outcome for…anything and everything. It was too boundless, too unclear.

And when the conversation ended, I still needed to go eat something and sleep and get to work on time. When I realized they couldn’t actually transport me out of that situation, their words didn’t seem quite so alluring. Especially when I knew that there were at least 20-gajillion other ways things could unfold. So if I got too wrapped up in the scenarios they were showing me, I lost track of where I was and [on] found myself even more frustrated by my day-to-day routine. [kept] I saw things moving both quickly and slowly, but that the significant changes only became apparent when I relaxed and did things I enjoyed.

I found that when I asked about Ships and Disclosure and Cities of Light manifesting, I didn’t like what I was seeing, didn’t want to share it. I didn’t want to be the bearer of slow tidings, much less the bearer of the news: “You’re not likely to see it on solid ground any time soon.” I projected onto others and myself: “We don’t want to hear that it’s in our hands. We don’t want the responsibility.”

We want the Cobras and Adamas and Metatrons and Keshes of the world to fix things for us, because we think the problem lies outside. Am I right, or am I just projecting?

That energy of focusing on something hoped-to-come leads me away from bliss. It draws me into wishing for something else, and while I’m doing that, illusory time passes and I find I haven’t enjoyed myself or helped anyone. Worse yet might be the possibility of finding regret lying in my path. No thanks.

I sort of went on strike for a while: Let me just live for a while, okay? I need a break.

Then, at some point, I realized that I really missed my friends, my community online. And that perhaps what I was experiencing might be of some value to others. Maybe I didn’t need to understand fully what was going on; I just knew that it was time to reconnect and start posting again. And to just lay it out as I see it and not worry about whether it’s what anyone wants to see or hear.

I also realized that I wasn’t being told these things would not appear – whether we’re talking ships or cities. I just wasn’t being given much detail or explanation. I needed to get over my personal wish to have the complete picture with all the answers before sharing things publicly. I just needed to trust and share the pieces.

In the midst of all that became more clear the role that meditation plays. I saw that even if a fleet of gorgeously radiant light ships were to land tomorrow and instantaneously offer everything we’ve all wished for, I wondered if we would know how to respond. Would we know ourselves well enough to honor that gift? I wasn’t so sure. What could improve that situation? Not the defeat of archons or currency changes or dissolution of governments, or even free energy. We could manage to screw up all of those opportunities if we don’t have the presence of mind to understand how we exist, where we come from and where we’re going, and to know how to check our own motivations and maintain our compassion and empathy.


So I saw I needed to say not only “It’s not gonna happen until we’re ready”; I also needed to say “We ain’t ready yet.” I don’t like that: being the messenger, or the message. But there you have it.

So this is why I press press press about working with the mind. It’s the root of everything, and the only thing we can control.

Fortunately, I’m not alone. I notice lately there are more and more people saying this, directly and indirectly, through many media in many walks of life. I’m so glad. Eventually it will become a part of culture and that’s how we will get ready.

Okay. Finally, I think I’m done for now and yes, that bloody FI has passed.

Thank you for reading, and for sharing this path with me. We will get there.

Leslee – Dream 23 March 2014

city in  box

city in box

Dream 23 March 2014

(Ghost Radar words appear in [brackets])

[essential] (I’ll preface this dream record by noting that I watched the movie Divergent yesterday afternoon, and it impacted me deeply. [anyone] Many aspects of it felt hauntingly familiar to me…)

[rapidly] I went to sleep asking to make a dreamflight [ever paint], and to recall it [properly].

[angry] I remember being in a place with a lot of people, and someone taking me aside and asking me to come with them to meet some particular people. I followed this person (I can’t remember what they looked like, gender, personality, any of that) upstairs to a floor that had only private access. Sort of like a teacher’s lounge suite, or an executive suite, or a private suite in a sports stadium. The people there seemed somehow important, or at least in positions of status or authority. There were maybe a dozen people milling around socially, not particularly seeming to notice I was there. It almost felt like a cocktail party or a reception. There were several rooms adjoining, and I walked around trying to understand the purpose and what was happening. [if] The person who had brought me there seemed to disappear, so I felt a bit alone and left to figure out what was happening. [flies] However, before long I bumped into my boss (in waking life), and he told me a little bit about the place. Apparently [Buddha] the purpose was to plan, design, and implement the creation of various facilities [beginning] throughout the world. I began to notice some scale models of facilities – even cities – set on pedestals for viewing.

As I’m looking around I notice people are eating and drinking, and I’m a bit hungry, so I begin to look around for food. At one point I turn around and a pedestal with a large tray of hors d’oeuvres has appeared. I approach it and take a plate to serve myself, but I’m also sort of looking around to see how the others are reacting, because I’m quite sure that the tray and pedestal had just appeared out of thin air, to a location where I had been standing just a moment before. No one else seems to be surprised, so I simply take some food and step away. [high-tide]

My boss appears again, and says he wants to show me a particular project. He wants to know what I think of it. I’m aware that this is sort of a test or an assessment. I sense that others are somehow watching to see how I respond. He guides me to another pedestal, a large table where a model sits under a large clear plastic cover-box. I lean forward and examine it closely. I recognize it.

It represents a complex of structures – buildings – that I’m very familiar with in its completed form. The scale is tiny; there’s one particular building that looms hundreds of stories high, but in the model is only about 45 cm tall. I notice and comment that there were some changes made during construction, so that the built objects differ from the model. There’s one particular cone-shaped tower up high on a post, that’s [familiar] very stark-looking, black and white. There are tiny threads and pulleys stretched from this very tall structure to the ground below, and a really minute little mannequin is attached to one of the threads. I look at it closely and turn to my boss, saying with surprise, “Why, they originally intended to just use cables? Fascinating!” He smiled and nodded, since we both knew well that the actual finished building used much more complex machines and electronics to transport people from the ground into the cone. It was as if the builders had chosen to use a mechanism that was needlessly complex and dependent upon a power source, when they could have kept it simple and straightforward. I scanned the rest of the model and noticed that this had been done with many of the structures.

So many things had been done to mystify so many things which could really have been quite simple. Why were so many things made so complicated?

I vaguely recall having conversations with other people there, but was left with a strong sense of being surrounded by academics, people who were focused on discussion and supposition, theoretical concepts, rather than dealing with what was right before their eyes. I really didn’t want to stay there [eyes] much longer, so I think it was then that the dream faded.

When I woke I was struck by not being able to recall the dream at first, because I knew there had been one, and that it had been quite extensive. I requested to recall, and eventually remembered seeing my boss, the plate of food, and the model, and bits more came back to me. I still feel there is a lot I’m not remembering.

However, I’m also having a funny feeling, a wondering if I really had the dream, or if it somehow popped almost fully formed into my consciousness, and that an aspect of that dream is the remembering of it as a dream that came while I slept, rather than [Kangyur kitchen ] something that was created after I awoke. I’m also getting a strong vibe of potential interference this morning, and will write about that elsewhere. [vision-quest]

This Grand Illusion of Physical Reality

Many many aspects of what Robyn describes are similar to the experience I had in 1999.


AngelicView: In this NDE, Robyn had an intuition that the baby she was carrying was not meant to be born. During her abortion, she died from too much anesthesia. She was so surprised when she got to the other side of the veil, at how real 3D human life seemed – knowing it had been just an illusion.


I went into this abortion clinic in Austin, under the strong impression that the baby growing inside of me was not meant to be born. How on Earth I knew that being the peaceful, ultra-sensitive, loving girl I was is a mystery. Never in a million years would anyone have guessed me as someone who would abort unless it was dire. In my unique case, the baby had detached from my uterine wall and was barely hanging on. Apparently all the stress caused spikes in my blood pressure and tonsillitis in the…

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More About Disclosure, Wisdom, Beings, Cities of Light… and Ghost Radar

It’s looking like a busy weekend…


city of fiery light

22 March 2014

Let’s continue along the theme of integrating thoughts and impressions about Native Wisdom, Extra-Terrestrial life and beings, and my personal (perhaps unconventional) experience of Vajrayana Buddhism… I recently posted about this in “Disclosure, Mandalas, Heruka” and “One River” …

I received a little more on this from Heruka yesterday, which I’ll share below. I was also struck that after I published a post before going to bed last night, Ghost Radar produced these words almsot immediately and in quick succession: [He-He-Ru-Ru-Kham (this is part of Heruka’s mantra) traffic experiment very-subtle-mind points-of-light Hopi threw past-tense Google Vajrayogini (another Vajrayana deity)  crowd (as in Mandala or Field of Merit?)  strip larger fiction slight time-warp element stove string swimming Catherine news rather Airl deaf 5 hiker shells lack virtuous behavior stone generally (the previous words all flowed out over the span of just under an hour) Bronwen Luke offer grandfather] 

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Heruka: Telepathy and Clairvoyance – 20 March 2014


(From Leslee: received from Heruka on 20 March, 2014. Ghost Radar words appear in [brackets].)

Over the past year or two, several people have asked for my help in developing their skills of telepathy, clairvoyance, or connecting with beings and/or guides. I never quite know how to respond, and every time I’ve asked for explanations from Heruka, His response heads off down another path. So this morning I’m requesting more information.

I’m also throwing in a cautionary note to all, that I think bears repeating again. For myself, developing these abilities (which I consider quite limited by my own obstructions) even to the level I have them, totally disrupted my life. So caveat emptor.

Dear Heruka, can we please focus [pleasure] on these requests now?

With pleasure. Let’s talk in general terms. I will be blunt. I’m going to generalize and put people who want these skills into three categories:

1. Those who wish to use them to develop their spiritual path (to help others);

2. Those who wish to use them to “escape” from outer conditions that they struggle with;

3. Those who wish to add them to their “collection” [principle] of skills (ego-pride).

I will help those [send] of the first [laid] kind.

We’re going to refer to this bundle of abilities as a single one, which for the purposes of this moment we will call “Pre-Cognition”. However, we use this term differently than it’s usually assumed. Here we mean knowledge that arises before cognition latches onto it and turns it into something [depression] “sensible”. Raw [mainly] unfiltered intuition. “Pre-Cognition” also suits us here because no matter how you struggle with this understanding, what you “see” only becomes “reality” through the process [special] of your seeing it, cognizing it mentally. So you “pre”-cognize it before it arises and [kept] once it arises, you “re”-cognize [nerves] it.

Okay. Let’s move on since your writing is slower than Ghost Radar speaks. “Depression mainly special kept nerves”: Those are some hints for you. Brain chemistry is involved here. Yes, it sources out of the pineal gland. Calcification does not affect mental abilities to the extent that it would prevent you developing skills.

But brain chemistry is just one aspect. Neural structure is another part. This comes from genetics, intention, and chemical/environmental factors. These factors engage in a  dance that defies precise description, because their interdependence constantly changes.

[dream] Each person can somewhat influence their own intention and chemical/environmental factors. Intention is easiest, but takes the most diligence. That’s where meditation comes in. Environment operates on macro and micro scales. You can move house, change city, country, continent. But for now you’re still on Earth. So let’s accept that.

Pollution and being surrounded by “others” with ignorant or negative intentions present challenges to developing pre-cognition. Mountains, oceans, large bodies of water/ice/snow have their own EM (electro-magnetic) fields that affect you. Deserts, trees… sand… all benefit. Metal structures can either help or hinder. In short, you could drive yourself mad trying to find out the perfect location for developing pre-cognition, so let’s forget that.

Eat pure foods. If you eat pure foods, cravings generally arise from needs. If you eat processed foods, cravings are unreliable. [shaking] Animal protein may help or harm, so experiment.

“Shaking”. Yes, meditation. This is the most important factor, and frankly, the one least attended to in general. And I mean a very specific kind of meditation. I don’t mean going in search of visions and connection. I mean start with basic, fundamental mindfulness.

Leslee, as people come to you asking for help developing skills, almost all of them (because of course I know them better than [giant] you do, or will) need to first spend a great deal of time – like a year or more – [world] regularly practicing mindfulness/insight/vipassana meditation. By this I mean 20 minutes a day of watching the mind dispassionately, and not traipsing off to follow images [scene] or emotions that arise. Traipsing leads to misunderstanding, until one can stop, control, and direct the mind.

Images that arise from an uncontrolled mind are unreliable.

If you try to develop pre-cognition before reaching this level of knowing your own mind, you open yourself to “a world of hurt”, to borrow an expression. And if you ask Leslee for help and yet have not done this preliminary work, quite frankly, you will get nothing more from me (Heruka).

Pre-cognition is not a hobby. That’s enough for now, we can continue this conversation soon.